Peace of Mind Can Be Stolen Too
HAVANA TIMES – For months I tightened my budget and stopped buying certain things. I saved money whenever I could. Friends who live far away also wanted to help, and little by little, through both my efforts and theirs, the possibility of buying an electric bicycle stopped seeming like a dream and became something within reach.
It wasn’t a whim, it was a necessity. In a city where public transportation long ago ceased to be reliable, having your own means of transportation means much more than simply getting from one place to another. It means getting to work without depending on a bus that never came. It means getting home before dark. It means reclaiming some of the time that endless waiting has gradually been stolen from us.
For weeks I thought I was finally going to solve one of my biggest problems, until other problems appeared.
A few days ago, a friend sent me some photos. They showed a man being held by a group of people. According to her, he had just stolen an electric motorcycle. Neighbors managed to catch him before the police arrived. I looked at the images for several minutes.
Suddenly, my joy began to mingle with another emotion: fear.
I started wondering where I could leave an electric bicycle without putting it at risk.
I thought about my home: I don’t have a garage.
Nor do I have a truly secure place to keep it. That’s when I realized I still hadn’t solved the problem. I had simply exchanged one worry for another, because buying it is difficult—but keeping it is too.
We live trying to find small solutions to make life a little more bearable. We save, improvise, ask for help, and do without many things. And when we finally think we’ve achieved a little peace of mind, we discover that it too seems fragile, as if it has to be protected all the time.
Sometimes I think that in Cuba we don’t just learn how to resolver—to make do—we also learn to worry about the very solutions we come up with.
I still don’t have the electric bicycle, yet I’m already thinking about buying a stronger lock, where I’ll leave it, and whether I’ll be able to sleep peacefully knowing it’s outside.
It’s curious. For months I dreamed of the day I would be able to buy it, never imagining that when that day finally drew near, the dream would come with another kind of sleeplessness.
Because there are places where people save money to fulfill a dream. Here, more often than not, we also have to learn how to defend it.